The State of the Union

The Dude has abandoned me once again to go visit his friends Philby and Meegy in Darwin where he is no doubt drinking Beer and having Good Times as we speak. Being SLY LIKE A FOX, the motherfucker diverted any tantrums, china tossing, door slamming, knife attacks etc which I had up my sleeve by spending yesterday cooking me various items, including lentil bolognese, chestnut soup and sweet potato soup (Verdict: "mister nora hereby pronounces these foodstuffs 'Delicious.'").

HOW SNEAKY IS THE DUDE? (very sneaky; also culinary).

Meanwhile I am stuck in Leningrad drinking coffee (instant edition) and finishing off Studying the Knowledge so I can acquire an Impressively Remunerated Professional Job where I get to become a High Net-Worth Individual with Multiple Whitegoods and a Corner Office with Views of Waterway by Fiendishly Crushing the Little Man; also apparently I must buy The Dude a yacht equipped with 19 year old underpants models (female) with bellybuttons full of cocaine and also a full bar.

Little does The Dude know that last night in his absence I went to a Place of Hip Hop where my Hips Awoke Passions (not so much my Hops) and I was "hit on" by an Unemployed Stoner with a Ponytail (DREAMBOAT ALERT!). I went on to stay up past MIDNIGHT, only to wake up this morning hungover and SURROUNDED BY PUSSY [cats]. Oh, it's racy times we live in, my friends.

On the upside:
- Claudie is in town and is totally ready for action.
- 5 and a half hours of Big Brother on the telly tonight.
- I have gone AWOL from the Font of Knowledge and am looking forward to an "afternoon of naps".
- Radio National on the Radio (derr).
- Conray, my love, my electric heater.

I'll keep you posted on further exciting developments (e.g. "mister nora boils the kettle - PM says: THAT'S HOT!") as they happen. Don't topple off the edge of your seat in frenzied anticipation, will ya now, babycakes. Bueno.

xoxo nora