The return of the roach?

So on Thursday night some Americans came over to chez mister nora for a slap up fish dinner and 10,000 bottles of wine, all at the taxpayer's expense (yeah we're all taxpayers, hey, except that mister packer, old turdcunt).

Ok so maybe there was no fish dinner, slap up or otherwise, like whatev's bro you're getting PEDANTIC>there was definitely wine.

I was supposed to be at working at one of my jobs (not Christian) where I accept cash, credit and cheque for all manner of goods and services (if you know what I mean, heh heh) (NO I AM NOT A FANCY WHORE you PERVERTED MOTHERFUCKER, I AM A SHOP GIRL) but when I showed up at the shop the dudes there were all like, 'hey mister nora what are you doing here? I don't see your name on the motherfucking roster!' So I was motherfucking out of there in like less than zero seconds, you have never seen a person move so motherfucking fast, I give you full refund no questions asked style guarantee, motherfucking. Ok enough with the MF.

So chez mister nora there was much glee at Surprise Night of Freedom from Labour, it was almost as good as the night I dreamt I was God and also Buffy the Vampire Slayer ALL IN THE SAME 8 HOUR STRETCH OF SLEEP. Anyway, Surprise Night Off turned into Not So Surprising Heavy Drinking with some twangy people from across the seas and of course The Dude. Take it from mister nora kids, Champagne Cocktails are your first class ticket to GoodTimesHadByAllVille, no doubt about it.

THE POINT OF THIS STORY being that through the misty screen of the Cocktails, the Sauvignon Blanc, the Stuyvies, the Nunga and then more of the Shampoo, I seem to recall someone saying "hey, wassat bug thing overr there onthe wall?"

DO YOU SEE WHERE I'M GOING WITH THIS?

CLAUDIE HAS RETURNED!!!!

And I am filled to the gills with guilt and shame and shandies because at the very moment that she made her triumphant re-entry into our lives, I was wearing an irridescent cowboy hat and ranting like a motherfucking cunt about how Narnia changed my life and I was TOO BUSY BEING DRUNK to welcome her back with the Pomp and Ceremony THAT SHE DESERVES.



And now I can't find her anywhere. Oh Lord, what have I gone and done???


xoxo nora