Today the Dude and I celebrate the addition of a new, special friend to our Slovenly Pit of Mutual Filth: a TOILET THAT FLUSHES!! I'm totally not exaggerating! That's right kids, we got ALL THE MOD CONS!
[NB mister nora’s legal counsel would like to make clear that “mod cons” should not be understood to include a dishwasher, freezer, functional oven, security system, VCR, DVD player, clothes dryer, electric kettle, playstation, ipod, post-1972 automobile, remote control tv, or a microwave. We say no to Progress; Progress says no to us.]
The Dude is currently lodged in the bathroom, flushing over and over again in excitement (fuck the drought! we have TECHNOLOGY!) while screaming that it’s like being in charge of Victoria Falls. “Look at me, I’m God! HAHAHAHA!” he shouts as he flushes.
It’s times like these I realise I have totally hit the Jackpot with The Dude. I’ll bet Ivana fuckin Trump never had luxury like this. As for that shabby little Danish fucker, let me just say this: Suck my Cock, Princess Mary!! HAHAHA!
xoxo nora
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